In Response...

Last week a post was made and I have been trying my hardest to let it roll off my back in the name of free speech, however I can no longer do that. I am at the point now where things I want to say are keeping me up at night, so here it goes. This post will be written in response to everyone who posted and responded to the abortion issue. Being a woman, I believe I have a much different view of this issue as the rest of you, as you were all male.

Many of you agreed with the idea that being partially pro-choice meant allowing the use of condoms and birth control (even though many anti-abortionists use condoms because they prevent the spread of disease) however, this entirely goes against the definition of what being pro-choice is. Being pro-choice is supporting the belief that women should have the right to control what happens to their bodies. It is supporting the belief that no person or government has the legal, moral, or ethical right to force a woman to have a child, which is what illegalizing abortion would do. By reversing Roe v. Wade it becomes a criminal offense not to want to be a mother. We outlawed eugenics and forced sterilization so that no one can force you not to have a child, so why would we now go in the reverse and force people to have a child if they don’t want one?

Also, illegalizing abortions will not stop them from happening. Women will revert back to four main options for abortion, all of which are highly unsafe and threaten the life of the woman. For those of you unaware of what these options are they are: having the procedure done in another country, going to a back-alley clinic, throwing themselves down stairs/having someone beat their stomach, and using a wire coat hanger. Illegalizing it would do much more harm than your purported good.

As for abortion for medical emergencies, while I am pro-choice I do support the ban on third trimester abortions save for the need of medical emergencies. The reasoning for this coincides with my reasoning for when a fetus is considered a child. Until the fetus can survive outside of the womb mostly on its own it is not considered a child. A child is a living, breathing entity and fetuses delivered before the third trimester cannot life and breathe and survive on their own. They are not fully developed and do not have the capabilities to do so. Therefore I fully support abortions before the third trimester in any circumstance.

Now some of you mentioned adoption and the morning after pill when discussing rape. Being men, I don’t think it is possible for you to understand the true horror of being impregnated by a rapist. Yes, both men and women can be raped and in both cases it is horrible and devastating, but women who are pregnant from a rape are given a daily reminder of the most horrible and traumatic experience of their lives. Every time they look at their stomach or feel a kick or movement they are reminded and relive the experience. Every time they look at the resulting child’s face and see the facial features of their rapist they are reminded and relive the experience. Isn’t the following trauma of being poked, prodded, and photographed at the hospital; recounting the story to the police; and testifying in court (if the rapist is even caught) enough? Now try fast-forwarding your life twenty years to the point where you have a 14-year old daughter. One her way home from school she is raped and the hospital does not offer her the morning after pill. Would you really force her to have that child and put her through more trauma? And please don’t let us forget the resulting psychological trauma of the child after they learn how they came to be in the world. Some of you mentioned adoption as a solution to this but as you will never be a mother and will never know the pain of giving up a child it is unreasonable for you to ask this of someone. Knowing that you have a child out in the world somewhere is very damaging to many women. Also many adopted children are curious about their birthparents so they too will eventually find out how they came to be in the world.

The only opinion that I somewhat agreed with is the need for better and more comprehensive sex education. Schools need to stop teaching abstinence and teach a more encompassing program to include sexual violence, relationship violence, date rape, gray rape, condoms, birth control, pregnancy, and sexually transmitted diseases. People need knowledge in order to make informed decisions.

Abortion is never a choice that women make lightly and it is a choice that needs to be protected. Many women debate for days or even weeks before deciding, and it is never a forgettable decision. I have accompanied friends to get the procedure done and they think about it most every day, even years afterward. I have had liberal pro-choice friends decide to have the child, and I have had conservative anti-abortion friends that had abortions. We never know what decision we are going to make until we are put in that situation to make it. That decision needs to be safeguarded. Even I personally do not know what I would do when faced with the choice of abortion, but that choice needs to be there. For future reference, many women would appreciate it if before you shoot your mouth off, you grow ovaries and a uterus and actually have the possibility of making this very difficult and life altering decision.